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Home > About Us > Blog > Online Daters, Beware: Romance Scams Are on the Rise

Online Daters, Beware: Romance Scams Are on the Rise

How to protect yourself from scammers who swindle money from those looking for love.

May 20, 2019

By: Robert Fultz, Fraud Investigation Manager, VyStar Credit Union

Thinking of turning to a dating site, app or social network to help you find “the one”? Proceed with caution: A rapidly increasing number of scammers are using these resources to steal money from unsuspecting online daters. According to the Federal Trade Commission (FTC), there were more than 21,000 reports of romance scams in 2018, with people losing a reported total of $143 million—a total that was higher than that of any other scam reported to the FTC that year.

Knowing the warning signs of a romance scam and getting familiar with important safety tricks can help you prevent imposters from stealing your heart—and your money.

What Is a Romance Scam?

A romance scam typically involves the promise of romance and companionship from online strangers that ultimately leads to the victim being asked for money. It begins when a scammer lures their target with a fake profile and/or photos via online dating sites, social media, mobile apps or other personal messaging systems. They then shower their intended victim with attention, giving the false impression that they are seeking a long-term friendship or serious romantic relationship.

Once the victim feels comfortable with the scammer—and possibly even starts falling in love with them—the perpetrator begins taking advantage of the victim’s emotions and creates fictitious scenarios (e.g., they claim they are having a medical emergency or say they need financial help to visit you) to get the victim to provide money, gifts, or their financial information.

These scams are intricately planned and can be carried out over an extended period of time (weeks, months or even years), as romance scammers invest a great deal of effort into gaining their victims’ trust—and ultimately their money or financial account details.

Warning Signs of a Romance Scam

Not sure how to recognize a romance scam? There are several telltale signs that can indicate that your “fairytale romance” isn’t quite what it seems to be. Red flags are raised when someone you meet online:
  • Tells you they have strong feelings for you shortly after meeting you
  • Sends you vague, poorly written messages
  • Gives you information about themselves that is inconsistent with their online profile (e.g., their profile says they majored in English in college, but their messages are riddled with spelling mistakes)
  • Tries to steer you away from the dating site and chat with you privately
  • Attempts to isolate you from your family and friends
  • Tells you convoluted stories that end with a request for you to send money, gifts or your financial details
  • Becomes desperate if you do not give them what they request
  • Continues to request more money/information after you’ve already sent them what they’ve asked for

How to Protect Yourself From a Romance Scam

If you fall into the trap of sending funds to someone who later turns out to be a scammer, your financial institution may not be able to refund or reimburse your losses. So, the best way to safeguard your money and financial information is to be vigilant and take the following proactive cautionary measures:
  • Be careful about how much personal information you share online. Scammers can use your information and photo to create a fake identity or target you with a scam.
  • Beware of someone who promises to meet you in person, but always gives excuses as to why they can’t.
  • NEVER share details about your financial account(s) or credit card(s), including account numbers, PIN numbers, Internet banking usernames/passwords, etc.
  • DO NOT send money to someone you don’t know personally or have never met in person. Be wary of anyone who asks you for money for transportation, communication fees, marriage processing, or medical or legal fees.
  • Be on the lookout for inconsistent information or poorly written messages.
  • If you meet someone online, do an online search of their profile photo to see if the same picture appears on different sites with different names. This is a clear indication that their profile is fake.
  • If your trusted friends or family members are worried about your online suitor, listen to their concerns. They may see something you’ve missed in your excitement about the new relationship.
  • If you plan to meet in person for the first time with someone you met online, make sure to let your friends and family members know the day, time and location of your meeting, and avoid traveling internationally for your first date.
  • If you suspect that someone is trying to lure you into a romance scam, immediately cease all contact with that person. This might be easier said than done: Since the scammer already has your contact information, they will most likely relentlessly try to track you down if you stop communicating with them—and they will not give up until you give them what they want. You may have to change your phone number and/or social media or dating profile(s) in order to prevent them from contacting you.

What to Do If You’re a Victim of a Romance Scam

Unfortunately, sometimes scammers can get the best of us. If you fall victim to a romance scam:
  • Immediately notify the dating site, mobile app or social media platform where you first met the scammer. Give them whatever details you can about the imposter’s profile to help prevent that person from victimizing others.
  • Contact your financial institution to report the crime right away. While it’s not always guaranteed that you will be reimbursed for your losses, you can help secure your account(s) from further damage. 
  • Report the crime online on the Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3) website.
  • File a report with the FTC, which will help U.S. law enforcement officials with their investigations. You can reach the FTC via their official website or by phone at 1 (877) 438-4338 or TTY 1 (866) 653-4261.

VyStar members who have any questions about their accounts or a scam, or who think they may have fallen prey to a scam, can reach our Contact Center representatives any day of the week, from 7:00 a.m. to 7:00 p.m., at (904) 777-6000 or 1 (800) 445-6289. You can also visit our online Protection Center to find more information about how to report fraud, how to protect yourself from fraud and scams, and how VyStar protects you.

And remember: One of the best ways to help safeguard others from scams is word of mouth, so make sure to spread the word to your family members and friends!

The content provided in this blog consists of the opinions and ideas of the author alone and should be used for informational purposes only. VyStar Credit Union disclaims any liability for decisions you make based on the information provided.

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904-777-6000 or 1 (800) 445-6289
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